BETTER NASCAR

I think NASCAR would be more fun for the drivers and more fun for the spectators if the rules would bee loosened just a little. In every race, there are a lot of drivers who are going to be also-rans, guys who are there mostly to fill out the field and finish no better than 20th. How much fun is that for them? Sure, they get to drive fast. But doesn't the sheer repetition of the sport get boring after awhile?

So I say we should allow the also-rans to have chicks and beers in the cars with them. It would make the pit stops more fun to see when two blondes jump out of a race car and two brunettes jump in. And it would be cool to see empty beer cans being tossed out the drivers window and a full 12-pack put into the car.

By about the 20th lap, these guys would form a special sort of obstacle course for the leaders to navigate, meaning that victory would require more driving skills than just turning left over and over and over. And think what fun the onboard cameras would offer, particularly if there's some NC-17 action going on. My goodness, this would make an American sport even more American!

At least, that's what I say.